i'm sorry

I'm sorry...
if my decision might hurt u...
i dun mean to hurt u at all bby..
all i noe i just nid tym off frm u..
do cntact me as per normal but dun ask me too much q n force me..
cos u noe hw i'm like...
i dun lyk being given q after q..
thnx for respecting my decision...
just dun stop believing...
u have ur ryt to love me or stop loving me...
all i noe,i'm not making u as my spare part but as my close fren now...
REMEMBER THAT K!!

I LOVE YOU for all i care...
if we r reali meant to be together,no matter where we go..
we will end up coming bec to each other...
tis is the fact!
mayb not now..
hu knows in later tyms??
no one noe...
onli god noe...
believe in hym,believe in urself n believe in me..
i would not do anything stupid aite!!!
love ya bby!!
will always do...

i'm soo confuse!!

the world is round,
no matter how hard u turn,
u will always end at the same point..

i dunno i'm feeling kindda down..

i have to make a decision..

lots of things came up into my life n i have to make my decisions or peeps will make a decision for me!!

all these things r making me confuse!!

i just wish tat i would wake up frm tis nightmare!

HOW I WISH!!

but i cnt!!

look..

i'm in a triangle situation again!

FUCK!!

sumtyms i hate myself...

but then again,i felt tat i'm too good to be true..

peeps love me for my clumsiness,hippie-ness and friendliness n kemanjaan aku..

wat i want to say is tis,i am a friendly person tat will be close to peeps easily but tat peeps should b a single ones n bukan matair org or laki org..

but again,peeps easily fell in love wit me just bcos of tis...

SHOULD I BE SO SERIOUS N A STUCK UP MINAH??

no ryt??

i'm being myself for once!!!

OH PLZ!!

it's ur choice to love me or stop loving me..

for all i care,i love both of u...

ACTIONS SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS.

tat's all fr now..

and tat's all i cn say to both of u..

i'm fucking vexed up wit everythng..

doesnt feel like going to werk tmr!

fuck!!

i just feel like fuck!!

hmm..

today had been a bore..
i was quite bz at werk...
but i was pretty much upset n kesian wit my fren...
she's been tru lots of shits..
but still,lots of shits still hit her again and again...
pls god..
let her have a good lyf...
all she ever wanted ws just a happy life wit her family..
but u make her fell into a trap tat she couldnt find a way out of it...
i pity her so much...
though i just noe her but i reali luv her as a sis..
pls enlighten her burden n giv her strength..
she's losing her loved ones...
i cnt bear to c her cry every single day...

b,u be strong ok..
i noe u cn...
all tis while u've been tru all shits n i'm sure u cn go tru tis also..
u r not losing the one u love...
trust me...
watever i said to u today,may came true...
believe me..
hv faith in HIM ok...
god is fair...
ily b..
dun giv up wat u hv now...
anything,u cn kol me k...
i'm always there 4 u if u nid me k...


bii,imy too luh...
sorry if i'm not paying attention to u tat much recently..
i dunno y i got so vexed up so easily tis few days...
sorry...
ily luhh..
so dun ever say tat u r the same as my frens...
u r my best fren,boifren n everything..
but i oso cnt live w/o my bestie jgk...
i nid both of u in my lyf to cmplete my breath...
so plz..
jgn amek ati...
ily soo much!!!!
i do!!

i felt sux!

i dunno y i felt sux...
haish!
its just not fair for me...
i wanted to be frens wit tis fucking guy but argghh!!!!!!!
hate hym uh!!!
he's freaking egoistic!!
he's not being fair!!!
i Criously curse hym siia!!!!
want hym to met wit an accident tat he would remember for the rest of his lyf!
fucker!!

cherry popper!!

my cheery had been popped!!!
huhu!!!
tis week is quite a bore at werk...
but then again,my cherry had been popped!
thnx to azman(syg at werk) n riduan(abg manager)...
huhu!!!
maybe u guys might be thinking sumtink else...
not that cherry luh assholes!
it means get a deal for a new rep like me!huhu!!
it wasnt actuali supposed to be mine luh...
supposedly azman shuld take the volume but the comission i take half but nvm...
da rezeki...alhamdulilah....

nutink much happen...
but to tell u guys honestly,my jo is not that simple..
i may make it sounds simple but no!
werk is tough since the newspaper bodoh hit our company by saying'ANI pancing org by using umarah..
FUCK LUH DEY!!
those peeps hu believe so the much in the papers r stupid...
sum r true,but sum r not...
fucker!
make my job difficult u noe!
nari is the best part of the week...
cos my client tat i've called for appointment came down...
wow!!
3 tron...
riduan was quite mangkok it me at first...
ape tk,my 1st client came in at 12.30pm but i dun wanna take them os i still steam2..
so gave it to daffy..
hehehe...sorry bos!

but then again,nari was bz for me..
cos there's tis indian muslim came in but no appointments made..
so the managers let me take them..
so yar...
talk to them n made frens wit them...
she agree to come tmr wit her husband...
poor thing cos she'd made the effort to come down wit her 6 mth pregnant daughter in law..
nvm...
than i sent them down to the lobby when riduan started to call me..
i was smoking wit kat when he came to us n asked me to clear my table..ok lor..
and best part is,he said that my another appointment is here!!
fuck!!
hurried up clear my desk n spray perfume n off to mit her..
she was nice n easy to make frens wit..
so she stayed frm 5.45 till 8.45...
wth!
kecian makcik...kne rush g werk..
so miting her next wk...
hehehe...

another thing tat made me happy was,i gt a letter frm my precious bbyboi!!!
huhuhu!!!!
so sweet of hym...
ily luhh bb...
only god knws hw much i miss u since the last tym i saw u...
he's coming out soon peeps!!
cnt wait to spent my tym wit hym again!!!
huhuhu!!!

jgn mara tau bby bugz!!
i tink u tau i refer to sape ni...
i told alr kn...
love u jgk!!!


tat's all for the week...
toodles...

my bby bugz wouldnt miss fetching me up after werk...
he's reali becoming the sweet ass as i used to know...
love u luh bby!!
lots of things we did...
we went to rent a movie at cineleisure n watch 'the hangover'..
in a private room..just the two of us after i'd finish werk...
than on sat went to bp slack ard...
than on sun g slack his house...hehehe...long tym since i last hang ard his place...
than my off day,went to catch a movie,'clash of the titans 3d'...
it wasnt lyk wat we expected..
we catch it at bugis...

plan was,went to movie than played pool n go sheesha-ing but cocked up...
thanks to me!!hehehe!!!
i was late an hour like normal...
janji kul 5 but mit hym kul 6...
pandai kn...
so we just went off to bugis n plan to play pool n go sheesha but tk jad..
g survey movie n eventualli at shaw ade cite clash of the titans 3d..
so decided to watched it since he'd been wanting to watch it since b4 it came out...
so yar...
spent our nyt at movie n off to bp...
slack ard hs crib n i'm off home..
it was his treat..
so i ketok maha ketok!LOL!!!
wan to eatnachos,donut,popcorns n soft drinks in the movie hall...
rokok lain...
hehehe....
jk2 bby...
i wouldnt b tat bad...would i???

here's sum pic of wat we did recently...

fri nyte:




he was o pumped up when he manage to get this anak patong wit just 1st try at the tikam2 ting...



mon nyt:

last wk,lots of things happen..
frm losing my fren,to losing my bf n changing bf..FUCK!!
it's sux!!
i'm feeling guilty to ayie...since we had to be apart n i had hurt his feeling lyk fucking helll.....
a person that had never hurt me as a fren n a boifren...but now,i hurt hym so much...
n he's engrossed wit me....
AYIE!!!!
Y wont u just listen to my explaination...
cb!!!
dun be so egoistic k!!
guys r like fuck!
one minute they luv,1 minute they dun...
but then again,they r just trying to pull ur legs off ladies...
i made a mistake by going to ayie after a few hour of breaking up wit faiz...
never tot that faiz gonna turn in to me soo soon...
than had difficulty choosing...
these 2 are so good to be true...
hehehe.....
i'm dealing wit 2 fucking feelings...
now,all i had left is just faiz...
cos ayie had bec off frm us n he made his mind of not cntacting me animore..CB!!!
i still wanna c ntact u cos i love u as my fren...but nvmm...
let hym cool dwn 1st...
one day i noe tat he's gonna b bec...i'm gonna miss hym so much!








as for now,i'm wit faiz again..
once upon a tym was my bby bugzbunny...
hope tat he'd not change his attitude animore...
u said tat u're biggest mistake was letting me go..n now,it's hard for u to let me go cos it's so difficult for u to get me bec...hope u realise wat u're saying n meant it...
though i do compare u wit ayie most of the tym,doesnt meant i dun love u...stupid dumb2...

anw,bii...
thnx for sending to werk n fetching me frm werk...
appreciate it...
u r such a sweet ass...
but mine is sweeter!! bluek!!
i want us to last forever n go tru everything together but pls,dun make me like u used to aite...
love ya!!

29 march 10

DAMN!!
these few days had been lyk fuckest tym of my life...
monday,
i went out wit bby to ICA to uat ic...
than,we're caught in the rain..
so had to cancel plan for sheesha-ing n went off to dog's crib...
had little fights wit hym since for few tyms i've been MIA...
so,plans was all cancel n he sent me home..
but smpi wlds,it was raining...
so bby had to wait for a while...
guess wat,i find hym weird cos when on the road,normally he will speed like nobody's bisnes but on tat day,he tailgate other vehicle...
nvm...
i was about to eat sumthing nearby my house when sum1 appear..
bby pull hym aside n talk,after tat,bby left just like tat...
wth???
i was confused n lost...
when bby zoom off,i was crying like no one's bisnes..
fuck!!!
so,i txted hym
"i dunno wat to say..SORRY"
tat's wat i manage to say to hym...
got info tat he bec off frm me n my x...
n he blame me for not telling hym the truth....
i noe!!!!
it's all my fault k!!!
i shuld hv listen to u in the 1st place...
but now,things had happen...
u hv the ryt to hate me like fucking hell but pls...
i noe u still luv me....
for 2 yrs u had been waiting fer me n now,u jz wanna break off our frenshp??
if i noe tat u luv me since we were still fren,i wouldnt hv had anyone else...
cos i tot tat i was clapping wit 1 hands...
rupenye tidak!!
but now,all i can say to u...
i nid u bec!!!
cos all tis while i've been wanting u so much but i cnt get u...
now,when i've alr get u,lots of things happen...
n u gave me up to my x jz lyk tat...
witout asking me wat i reali wan...
fucker!!!
i hate a coward like u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i wan u to be in my lyf bec....
as hw u usd to...
as a fren...close fren...where i cn complain tons bout my bf n everything...
pls bby!!!
i luv u as a fren n bro...